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Friday, August 31, 2007 In 12 hours' time, I'll be on the plane to Copenhagen. And I'll be back on Monday night, Uppsala time. So, especially to my parents: Don't panic if you don't see me online. Haha. Tuesday, August 28, 2007 To get a feeling of how I felt today: 1) Open your fridge freezer. 2) Put your exercise bike in front of the freezer. 3) Put an industrial-sized fan in front of your freezer. Aim it at your exercise bike. 4) Turn up the fan to its highest setting. 5) Sit on your exercise bike 6) Pedal as hard as you can. Temperature: 11 degrees Celsius Wind speed: 37km/h NW Humidity: 67% And it's supposed to get worse.. Whew. Monday, August 27, 2007 Nice article about how using the computer just before bedtime might degrade quality of sleep. I'm gonna test the theory out tonight. Initial adrenalin rush is over, and I suppose I'm pretty much settled in. These couple of days don't really feel like going anywhere, or doing anything. Although meeting Yoyo yesterday afternoon was fun. She cooked dinner for me too! And I swapped a knife for a microwave rice cooker, which is a great deal. =P The weather grew cold all of a sudden, starting yesterday. The day before it was 13-26, but for the past 2 days it's 5-15, and my teeth were chattering as I cycled back from Yoyo's apartment last evening. Oddly, the sun still rises at 6am and sets around 8pm. Hmm I was gonna post the article and ended up rambling. Anyway take care everyone. Sunday, August 26, 2007  You gotta be a real geek to understand why the last frame is so funny. And there's a lunar eclipse today! I wouldn't get to see it from here, and I'm not sure if you guys back home can see it (10.37 GMT ~ 18.37 SG Time?) But do take a glance in, like, 4 hours time. Thursday, August 23, 2007 Maybe I am just fumbling around here in Sweden. Sometimes I feel like a 3-year-old playing adult. Heck, I know less Swedish than the average 3-year-old here. But everything still turns out some-form-of-right eventually. I get to eat, I get to sleep, I haven't committed any crimes, haven't offended anyone enough to get punched or otherwise mistreated (I think..). Life is trying to teach me a very important lesson here. That sometimes things go wrong, sometimes we make people upset, sometimes we get upset, but as long as we pick ourselves up, learn our lessons and move on, life goes on and things somehow will get some-sort-of-done. But, if we ever give up on ourselves, give up on the world, curl up in a corner and just wait to die, then die we will. Wednesday, August 22, 2007 All things considered, I give myself 6.5 out of 10 today. All the excitement and enchantment has been put on hold as I try to survive in the treacherous suburbia: where distances are triple what we're used to and temperatures are half, brand new language with brand new vowels -- a kaleidoscope that mesmerises like a swaying cobra. Today I conquered starvation. I wonder which ones I'll conquer tomorrow? Hopefully poverty (set up bank account, fund transfer from Singapore), and maybe sloth (get a bicycle). Sunday, August 19, 2007  In less than 24 hours I'll be on my way out of here. And I'm so glad that before I leave, I managed to pay my respects to my grandparents, meet some of my closest relatives and also my sec. 4 classmates. I guess I'll miss a lot of people, and things, and food, while I'm away. But most of those will hit me only a couple of months later. What I already miss, now, is what I've been missing since, I'm not sure when. MSN chats don't count, looking from a distance doesn't count, because they are just fragments of the rainbow, far from the real thing. But really, I've said far more than enough about this. Even if you don't read this. 绝口不提 . Take care, everyone. I'll see most of you again in 5 months' time. Saturday, August 18, 2007 The audience at yesterday's Budak Pantai performance were treated to a big bonus: the chance to enjoy fireworks from the YMCA rooftop. It was one of those wish-you-were-here moments; wish you were with me to feel the magic, the joy and the wonder. And your smile will light up the night sky more brilliantly than all the fireworks in the world. I almost did ask, but I know you wouldn't. Not at the short notice that I had, anyway, of the spare ticket. Although I suspect the length of notice does not matter -- the answer will still be the same. Wait, I was supposed to say that there'll be many other chances in the future, but why does that sound so much like self-consolation/self-deception to me? =( Anyway Budak Pantai rocks because of their showmanship -- no one leaves the performance without laughing. I can see the hard work and thought that goes into each of their performances, and the results are thankfully obvious, so I don't have to say anything more. Don't think of it as a date with me la, because it's not (although I think it'll make a wonderful date), not when there're so many other friends around. But I digress. So for the friends who've just spent the crazy night and crazy morning with me, here's a song that describes us (we're not as old as we claim to be lah, actually) The Corrs - So YoungWe are taking it easyBright and breezy We are living it up Just fine and dandy We are chasing the moon Just running wild and free We are following through Every dream, and every need And it really doesn’t matter that we don’t eat And it really doesn’t matter that we don’t sleep It really doesn’t matter, it really doesn’t matter at all ‘Cause we were so young then We are so young, so young now And when tomorrow comes We’ll just do it all again We are caught in a haze On these lazy summer days We’re spending all of our nights just A-laughing and kissing, yeah No it really doesn’t matter if we don’t sleep No it really doesn’t matter if we don’t sleep It really doesn’t matter at all (x2) And it really doesn’t matter that we don’t eat And it really doesn’t matter that we don’t sleep It really doesn’t matter, it really doesn’t matter at all Maybe, rather than living each day like it was our last, we should live each day like it is our first instead. Because that's precisely what it is: the first day of the rest of our lives. Whereas, if today really was the last day of our lives, we could do stupid without regard for future consequences, the fact is that there is a high likelihood that that is not the case. In order not to have any regrets about the past (which is the most frequently touted reason for living each day like it is the last), it seems to make more sense to make sure, today, that we'll not have any regrets in the future. So yesterday's (and today's) craziness has thrown my remaining schedule all out of whack, and now I have a million and one things to do in 'definitely not enough time' (as compared to 'nearly not enough time'). After all, we'll have many more chances to go crazy and not sleep after I come back (and I fully intend to take advantage of those chances), right? But no regrets, considering that was my last chance this year, and I've satisfied my mahjong craving, Winning Eleven craving, and 'thon-overnight-like-we're-still-young craving all in one night. =D Friday, August 17, 2007  It's a pity they're over.. Wednesday, August 15, 2007   Friday, August 10, 2007  well said. Thursday, August 09, 2007 May tomorrow be a perfect day May you find love and laughter along the way May God keep you in his tender care Till he brings us together again Till he brings us together again GOODNIGHT FRESHMEN!! By a stroke of luck I managed to make it back for the final night of hall orientation. It's because of things like these that I love Block A, and I'm going to miss everyone while I'm away. Wednesday, August 08, 2007  I need to learn how to let people win without them realising it.. =P I suppose my task might have been easier if I'd never won against them in the first place.. Haha.. Monday, August 06, 2007   Sigh. And double sigh. Treated the family to Crystal Jade yesterday. The xiao long bao at Suntec was substandard, but the noodles were ok. The parents seemed appreciative but they didn't enjoy the food as much as I hoped they would. What's the point of eating expensive food, then, if it doesn't bring more enjoyment than cheaper food? Still, my parents only step into restaurants for weddings and my treats, my intention was to let them enjoy the experience. Though I wonder, if it matters to them where they eat, or is it just me trying to make myself feel better? Sometimes we try to help, or to make someone happy, from the wrong direction. In our misguided and mistaken attempts to make things better, we do things that make no difference to those who we care for, or sometimes make things worse instead. It's a pretty tragic thing, because how are we to know, unless someone tells us? Maybe that's where the saying "The road to Hell is paved with good intentions" comes from. Just like in the recently concluded serial 争分夺秒 (which is actually quite good Windz, just that it gets draggy at some places), the girl, who was mentally ill and suffered from delusions, did things to try and help her man, to save him. However all she ended up doing is cause a lot of trouble for her man, and cause the whole problem to escalate unnecessarily, eventually causing her man to go insane and get himself killed. While the things we do are (hopefully!) not of such terminal consequences, and while none of us suffer from delusions of that extent, we nevertheless unknowingly, innocently, with all 'good intentions', do the wrong thing. Just say everything out, right, and when we know how each other thinks everything will be ok? But life is more complicated than that, sometimes we don't know what to say, sometimes we don't know how to say it, sometimes we cannot say. Hard not to get jaded with life, huh? ;-) Only the insecure constantly seek affirmation and encouragement. A person has to be more confident in his judgement and his decisions, in the absent of contrary evidence. A journey made in hesitation is as doomed to failure as a journey not made; if any steps must be taken, let them be big, firm, steady ones. An amazing FA Community Shield, which saw Van der Saar almost single-handedly win the match for Man Utd. He saved 3 out of 3 penalties, while Man Utd scored to 3 out of 3, to win the 'glorified friendly'. A match that spoke volumes about the gulf between the two managers, Mourinho and Ferguson. Chelsea had the better men, on average, proof that money can buy many things. However, Man Utd had the better team, being stronger in terms of teamwork and attacking flair. That, therefore, is a testament to the managerial prowess of Ferguson -- his ability to make a good team out of good men, and to make better men out of good men. Ferguson has groomed many stars, such as Beckham and Giggs, and Cristiano Ronaldo looks set to join that list as one of his biggest successes yet. For Mourinho, on the other hand, all that can be said, maybe, is that he has an eye for talent. But I despair when I see what he has done with that talent. My heart breaks when I see Wright-Phillips play: 3 years ago, he had so much potential. 3 years on, that potential is still just that, and I can't help but wonder, what if Ferguson had bought him instead? Some more random opinions: Ben-Haim is quite the ruffian, and if the match had dragged into extra time, it would have become a question of whether Ben-Haim gets caught by the referee and sent off, or Rooney loses his temper over it and gets sent off first. Chelsea was toothless in attack, except for a moment of brilliance by Malouda (a hint to Ferguson that he needs a replacement for Ferdinand sooner than he thinks); seems like they can't do anything without Drogba. They do not have the near-telepathic understanding that Man Utd has, where Man Utd can pass without looking and make flowing moves, Chelsea cannot. In summary, Chelsea are a long way away from challenging Man Utd for the league title, and ever further away from the one trophy that eluded them all these years: the Champions League trophy. Sadly, as Abramovich no doubt realised, for all of Mourinho's flaws he is still the best man available for the job. Thursday, August 02, 2007 usually things start getting violent from here on.. I know, I've tried it before. =P  rofl.  I was searching for songs from last week's ktv session, when I came across this one that I thought was brilliant. Lyrics follow: 郑中基 - 绝口不提爱你 闭上眼睛忍住呼吸 暂时要和世界脱离 就快要学会不再想你 却听见不断跳动的心 我允许了你 让爱的自由还给你 我允许了自己 承受这悲伤到天明 我不愿放弃却要故意默默允许 我答应自己爱你的心绝口不提 总是以为终究化作云淡风轻 爱你到底痛了自己 我不愿放弃却要故意默默允许 我答应自己爱你的心绝口不提 所有结局在这夜里都已成形 爱到了底痛的是我的真心 I like acoustic versions of songs because the singer becomes solely responsible for bringing across the meaning and feeling of the song. And here I think he's done it, because my heart is humming in resonance as I listen to his song. It's top spot on my playlist now, if anyone's interested. I seem to prefer simple stuff in life. That's why I've always preferred acoustic versions of songs rather than the full musical version. I enjoy raw food and simple food, like salads and sashimi, much more than most other people do. I prefer girls who only put on light makeup, or are pretty/brave enough to go out with no makeup (I always ask my cousin if she's going to act in Chinese opera). I prefer friends who aren't complicated ('simple' is the wrong word to use here), who are straightforward and honest and not like some multi-layered onion (though ironically that's exactly what I am). I don't like clothes with complicated designs, in fact a lot of my shirts are plain, just one solid colour. So anyway hall orientation is starting today, and this time my role is different yet again. After one year as freshie and one year as OGL, this time I'm playing the undecided-if-I'm-going-to-be-returning senior (no, I don't want to be a fake freshie). I'm even of two minds over whether I should go back at all or not, I think if I do it will be a case of 醉翁之意不在酒, for I will not be going back to see the freshies, but to.. Well, I hope everyone has fun, seniors included. I know I did, last year, I had even more fun than during my own orientation =P. Wednesday, August 01, 2007 For the past three weeks, the dreams have been tiring. Running, fighting, searching for something that is forever just out of reach. Last night's dreams were tiring, and weird. And, perhaps, a reminder that things cannot be forced; that sometimes we strive so hard to get something, but when we do get it it feels hollow, wrong even, because we were so fixated on that goal that we've lost sight of what was really important. And today's one year to the day that I undertook what I feel is the most mature action I've made so far. Others might beg to differ, but I'd beaten all the possibilities to death and the one I chose offered the best chances. But that was probably the last right thing I did - since then my grades have slipped quite badly, and of the 5 goals I set for myself, I did not even accomplish a single one. People might say, you aim the stars to hit the moon. But I believe in setting goals that require just a bit of extra effort to succeed, that encourage myself to push my boundaries a bit and grow as a result. For the past year I buried my head in my shell; and when things hit me because I wasn't looking, I took that as reason to bury myself deeper, for longer. At least now I'm poking my head out and looking at the carnage and going "Oh **** what have I been doing?" So I'll try not to break any more things from now on. |
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