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Thursday, March 26, 2009 The bee hoon stall auntie knows me by sight now. She just commented that I always order the same stuff. 何とかうれしくなる。 朝起きる時、僕わ「学校へ行きたくない」と思った。けど、今日学校ではいろいろないい事があった。I bumped into W (old JC classmate) at the canteen, I got back my midterm test, and I had fun talking about Jdramas with S. So I now feel a little re-energised. Actually, when I get very good marks from my tests, I always feel a bit embarrassed, or maybe ashamed. Because I'm not actually a smart person, as people who've talked to me enough will notice. And because smart, contrary to popular belief, cannot be learnt (not any more at my age, at least), I became the next best thing instead. Next best in the context of academic education. I became good at studying, especially last-minute studying. That's why I hide my grades from people, because it generates the misconception that I'm smart. Then people get disappointed when I open my mouth. Yah, I got a damn good grade for my test. One of the good stuff that happened today. So I guess, for that module, as long as I keep up the effort, I'll get the A that I'm aiming for. I just hope I don't fall short in the other modules (and especially the damned FYP), because I have no leeway at all. One slip-up means that ALL the effort is for naught. I hate situations like this. By the way (as though this is minor news), the shit has hit the fan. I'm now on emergency damage control, which means cancelling all social and familial obligations until I get things under control again. It's not as bad as it sounds lah. Deadline is 2359 tomorrow so all lambs that come in after that are safe from sacrifice. Meanwhile I've got more work than hours till the deadline, so let me get back to it.
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