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Monday, December 24, 2007 Life is full of unseen currents. I went in search of one, foolishly thinking that I could free my friend from its clutches. No surprise that I was swept away by it instead. It's not about the effort. Of course not. If one insists on pushing at a door that can only be pulled, the effort is meaningless. I'm not good with words. Have never been. And so many things cannot be said. So I went and tried to lend a shoulder to my friend's burden, despite the staggering weight already on my back. I hoped to help him stand up straight and stiffen his back. I was under the false impression that sharing the burden makes it lighter for everyone. Now, I carry yet another stone on my back, yet another need to take sides and say, "You're right and he's wrong", even if it's never that clear-cut. As for my own stones? I've to carry them for a while longer. The heaviest stone, I guess I can throw away any time. But it's actually an egg, not just any old stone, and I'm still hoping that it'll hatch one day. Because, if it does, it will be beautiful. That's why, despite the weight, I'm stubbornly holding on to it. Although, in the near future, if nothing happens, I'm really going to let it go. And it will not be a question of whether that is right or wrong, but "What took you so long?". Despite the gloomy tone of the above, I'm enjoying my London trip thus far! Things have been great and I'm enjoying the company of good friends, even if I end up carrying stones with them (who asked me to volunteer?). I'm continuing my tradition of spontaneous adventures, and we've rented a car and are driving to Wales from Thursday onwards. No Spain, no Italy, no Vienna, maybe no Germany either but that's ok, it just means that I really must come back again someday.
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