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Tuesday, July 10, 2007 Oh I just saw this.. Hilarious! =D  Now, on to the feature of the day:  [Disclaimer] This has no bearing on actual events. The Stairway with No EndThe sage was taking his daily walk through the nearby forest park. Using his infinite wisdom, he has just decided that it was time to head back home for dinner. As he strolled along the cobblestone path, he suddenly spied a staircase leading to the left, half hidden in the bushes. "That's odd," he remarked to himself, "In all this time I've never noticed this staircase before. I wonder where it leads." The sage walked over to the head of the staircase and peered down. "Why, it appears to be a shortcut to my house! How.. quaint." It makes things doubly strange because he's never noticed the staircase on his way out from home, either. Just as he was pondering whether to try this interesting new route out, or to take the usual leisurely and roundabout route home, his stomach made the decision for him -- it gave a gentle rumble. In his infinite wisdom, the sage decided that he had better take the fastest route home. Feeling very pleased with his wise decision, the sage whistled a merry tune as he strode down the first steps of the staircase. The staircase passed through dense forest and, within two dozen steps, the surrounding had turned dim and cool, and the air was refreshingly crisp. The sage headed merrily down the steps, taking in big lungfuls of the fresh, oxygen-rich air, heading towards the bright exit ahead. In the middle of a particularly deep breath, the sage was startled when the exit was suddenly shrouded in darkness. As he coughed and tried to get his breathing normal again, he realised that the road ahead is now dark as a moonless night, and he could see barely 5 steps ahead. Suppressing his panic, he turned his head behind, and saw with relief that the way back was still clear. In his infinite wisdom, he decided to head back up the staircase. When he reached the top of the staircase, breathing heavily from the exertion, he turned his head back and saw that the darkness had cleared, and he could see the other end again. He made a quick count and estimated that he was barely twenty steps from the exit when he turned back. Sages, in their infinite wisdom, shouldn't swear, but he was tempted to right then, especially when his stomach chose to remind him then that it was almost dinnertime. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, counted to five, and then decided that he should give the staircase another chance, because, well, he'll still end up at home earlier than he would normally be. So he opened his eyes, and, with a loud "Harrumph" set off resolutely down the staircase. To cut the long story shorter (for the sake of the growling stomachs), midway down the staircase, the road ahead became unnaturally dark again, and the sage pressed on stubbornly. But after 3 more minutes had passed and the end was not yet in sight, the sage began doubting his infinite wisdom. 2 more minutes of stomping down the stairs passed before the sage finally decided that it might be better to head back. By the time the sage reached the head of the stairs again, his stomach had given up its patience, and his legs and lungs were whining also. As he leaned on the staircase railing and panted he happened to look down the stairs, and he could still see his house in the distance, dimmer now in the fading light. He thought of his dinner, cooling in the evening air by now, and of his massage chair, which he'll need tonight especially. He thought of how he'll be home now, with a full tummy, sitting in his massage chair watching TV, if not for the stupid shortcut. Angrily, he picked up a pebble and hurled it down the staircase. It bounced, thrice, then landed right in the middle of the path that leads to his house. It seemed to smirk at him, sitting right where he'd expected to be half an hour ago. Even the sage, in his infinite wisdom, couldn't stand such an insult. Even though his infinite wisdom counselled prudence, it was now, to him, a matter of principle. No way was a silly staircase going to fool around with him. He stomped his way down the staircase... That was fun. Don't fall asleep reading it. =)
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