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Saturday, March 13, 2004 Short and sharp thunderstorm in the evening. The skies made a tremendous din, the sounds and lights were impressive. There must have been 1 lightning strike every 3 seconds or so. If I had a camera with shutter control I'd have some pretty pictures. 1 plus point for getting a digicam. I've been scouting around but ain't willing to take out my wallet. Hard work for little money makes one stingy. Haha. =P There's this voice in my head that drags me to doom. I call it the short-sighted one. I suppose I've been listening to it too much in the past. What it does is focus on the short-term feelings and emotions, and allow them to influence my actions, mainly negatively. It keeps whining, "I'm tired, let's take a rest", "I'm tired, let's not go out today", "I'm tired, ignore him, he can fend for himself", and other such negative stuff. And I listen to it too much. Thus causing my "personnel problem" in camp. Damn it to hell. I tried not listening to it today. I went out with friends today. True friends. Friends who are there for me whether I deserve it or not. Most days I think I don't deserve them. I enjoyed myself rekindling the friendship. Compared to the alternative of spending the afternoon at home in front of the computer, I think I made the right choice. Thanks JQ, PF and C, for an entertaining afternoon. I've not had so much to laugh about for so long. Especially PF, your warmth really made my day. Thanks Ed, for coming along. Sometimes you might feel weird, and many times you make small sacrifices, but you always keep me company whenever I need it. Pity you had to leave because of an emergency, but hope you have a nice day today. I'm growing up, I suppose. Bit by bit, sometimes by the hard way, I'm becoming more mature. I can look back at my previous actions and see how silly they are. Next step is to actually stop doing them silly stuff. First I can quash this stupid voice in my head...
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